It's Good To Be Queen --

Journaling Queen
Erica Miner

Have you journaled in the past and are trying to get started again? Are you journaling now and need some hints on how to keep motivated? Meet Erica Miner, Journaling Queen, who has lots of ideas to help you get that 'jump start' and will answer your questions about how to get those creative juices flowing.

Dear Journaling Queen:

I am preparing to go on a trip with my family to visit distant relatives that I haven't seen in a long time. I am very excited and of course plan to bring along my journal to capture family stories, memories, and my experience on the trip. However, writing this all down takes time, and while I don't want to forget anything, I also don't want to miss out on spending time with my family! How do I balance living life and recording life?

Fondly, Dallas

Dear Dallas,

Generally I recommend journaling during 'down time'—e.g., late at night after everyone has gone to bed—but in the case of traveling, the equation changes somewhat.

You do want to optimize your time 'living life', seeing sights and spending quality time with family. On the other hand, it's so very important to preserve those memories-in-the-making. I suggest carrying a small pocket-sized notebook (many of these are available online on such sites as the Sam Flax catalog), with a small pen attached, if possible, in your purse, totebag or even your pocket, where it will be handy for those moments-on-the-run that you don't want to miss recording.

If you write fast—as I imagine you do, since you're a writer—you can quickly record those little 'bons mots' or tidbits of conversation, impressions of places or people (usually the first impressions are the most profound and 'true', so to speak.). Later on at day's end, you can collect your thoughts and write in more detail. For me, there is almost no greater way to end a day and transition into sleep than to write down your thoughts and feelings about the events of the day, the new people you've met, and the familiar family members you have traveled so far to see!

Enjoy your travels and best of luck to you. Do write back and tell us how your trip and journaling turned out!

Your Journaling Queen,
Erica Miner

Dear Journaling Queen:

I am a big fan of journaling. I might never have written my first novel if I hadn't journaled through the many years I had given up what I considered real writing. Of course, I didn't consider journaling real writing; now I know better. Still, I'd like to start from square one. I'd like to know—if I were taking a class—what you would tell me is the most essential part of journaling? And, also what I could do—if I were starting over—to keep my journals more organized, "searchable," and therefore more "usable!"

Your fan and Fellow Queen,
Carolyn Howard-Johnson
The Frugal Promotion Queen

Dear Queen Carolyn,

Thank you for pointing out the importance of journaling as 'real' writing. Many writers downplay this aspect of writing, but it has been extremely key in the writings of many well-known authors: James M. Barrie, Virgina Woolf and Franz Kafka, to name but a few.

To answer your question: for me, the most 'essential part of journaling' is consistency. That is, to make the commitment to yourself of a time and place to journal and keep with it day to day (or night to night, as per your preference.)

Choose the time that is likely to be your most productive in terms of ability to concentrate without distractions: for instance, a mom with young children might be too exhausted to journal after the kids are in bed, but while they're napping or at school could be the perfect choice; whereas a working baby boomer woman might need to wait until the late evening when all's quiet (and hubby or significant other is snoring away!) Then decide on a place that is comfortable and conducive to deep thought but not so relaxing that you will fall asleep over the page.

And speaking of pages, what you journal in is also important: you will want to use, for example, a book with blank pages that is attractive enough for you to want to write in it but not so beautiful that you won't want to sully its pages with your scribblings.

As far as organizing your journals, I'd like to address that in a separate question/answer, and for that I need to ask you a question: what kind of format do you journal in, how many journals do you have and how much is written in each of them? If you could enlighten me with this further info, I could best respond to your journaling needs.

In the meantime, do check out my journaling article on AbsoluteWrite, which will give you some more hints to get those creative juices flowing.

Write On,
Erica Miner
Journaling Queen
Author of Travels With My Lovers
Fiction Prize Winner,
Direct from the Author Book Awards
Top-rated Lecturer, Celebrity Cruise Lines
Got a question? Click here

After the first response, Carolyn had more to ask!

Dear Journaling Queen:

What can I do—if I were starting over—to keep my journals more organized, "searchable," and therefore more "usable"! I have journals and scrapbooks from vacations, diaries from high school, loose letters I wrote to my husband when I was furious and never gave them to him, ideas for poems ... you get the idea. But in terms of books only, I maybe have 150 of them. Unfortunately, they are all different sizes and thicknesses and some of them bulge so they can't be stacked. And even worse, unlike computers, none of them has a "find" function. LOL. That means the only way to glean from them is to spend hours browsing and I've learned that browsing is best. If I'm looking for something specific I just get frustrated and give up.

Your Fellow Queen

Carolyn Howard-Johnson
Queen of Promotion and Temporary Queen of Poetry (Coming later in 2005! (-: )

Dear Frugal Promotion Queen,

This is a huge topic—150 journals!—but I will address it as best I can in one response. I think a 'boot-camp-getting-organized' solution might best suit your needs. In other words, before you even think of organizing these vastly different category-wise, you need to do a left-brained exercise. Here's what I would suggest.

Schedule yourself a chunk of time—literally, write it in your date book—for going through your various journals. Clear away a space in which you will arrange all of them, a large shelf if possible, just for your journals. Pull out a few at a time, sit on the floor and organize them according to type (diaries, letters, scrapbooks, etc.), then size. (For the 'bulging' ones you may need a separate box.) Do this for as long as you have patience; when you can't deal with it anymore, put them on the allocated shelf in order of size (I know this sounds silly, but it will give you a visual advantage when you want to search for something.) If you need another day, another hour, allow for that; but try to do it all in one week, an hour a day perhaps, until you have sorted everything.

Then put them in chronological order. This is probably the most important step, but you can't get to it, dear Frugal Promoter Queen, until you've done the above left-brained organization. This is where your computer will come in. Once you've got everything organized according to category and chronology, you can start a new file on your computer—I would suggest Word or an Excel spreadsheet—that will keep track of what, where, when, etc. THEN you will be able to keep track of all your writings and look up what you need when you need it— and not 'get frustrated and give up.' It sounds like a lot of work, but it will be worth it in the end, especially when it comes time to refer to these when writing your next novel(s)!

By the way, thanks for bringing up the subject of 'unsent letters.' I have a whole mini-lecture on that, which I will address in my next monthly e-mail newsletter, so stay tuned!

(For those journaling Queens who do not yet subscribe to my newsletter, please feel free to do so.

I hope I've given you a bit of help with your question. Take courage, and if you need more motivation, don't hesitate to contact me.

As always,
Erica Miner
Journaling Queen

Travel Queen
Hillary Easom

Dear Travel Queen:

Hi there! I recently was talked into a family trip with my sister, her husband, five-year-old boy, and two-year-old girl. Add to the mix my husband, my fifteen-year-old and his running buddy, my eight-year-old, and me. The trip is to the Smokey Mountains and we have rented a cabin. I picked out a huge one with lots of room for everyone, but sister vetoed it for a much smaller one on the side of a mountain with great views. I am beginning to think I have lost my mind. Of all my sisters, this is the only one with kids but also the one I am the least closest to.

Suggestions on how to make this work? We live several hours away and don't see each other a lot due to my kids participating in baseball, soccer, football, flag football, and anything else they can find. The boys are looking forward to hiking and fishing and anything water related. I am leaning more toward margaritas and the hot tub. Can you tell I'm a bit nervous?

Nervous,
Queen Red

Hi, Queen Red!

Family vacations always seem to have an interesting, um, dynamic. There are inevitably things nobody can agree upon; your predicament is no different. It sounds to me like your sister is making an effort to spend some quality time with you, since you are not particularly close (in either sense of the word) and she "talked you into" this trip. Take that as a compliment!

A few challenges stick out. First, the children's age range is pretty broad. Obviously, your 15-year-old is not going to be hip to the same activities as your 2-year-old niece. Fortunately, he'll have a friend along, and if he's like most teenagers they'll keep themselves entertained. That leaves you with only your husband, your 8-year-old, and yourself to worry about. But no worrying necessary... Read on.

While I agree with you that the larger cabin would have been more practical for such a large group, you'll have to let go of that one. Close your eyes and imagine yourself sitting in the hot tub, margarita in hand (salt or no salt?), enjoying the view of the mountains and the cool breeze blowing through your hair. This is paradise.

Remember that you are not responsible for anyone else's good time. I'll say it again: you are not responsible for anyone else's good time. The boys will hike and enjoy their water sports, and you can be happy knowing they are so easily entertained. This will probably be a wonderful respite for them from their busy at-home sports schedules. Your husband can take care of himself (though hopefully you two will get some good one-on-one romantic mountain time too, even if only for a few minutes). Your kids are old enough to not need a constant eye on them, which will allow you more freedom to soak up some R&R. (Be grateful you're no longer the mom with the toddler.) Truly, your sister's family is her responsibility, and while it will be nice to spend time together it is not up to you to make sure they're all "okay."

Hopefully you and your sister will be able to spend some good time together as well. Maybe she too is craving the hot tub and a margarita! Make time for that. Take advantage of the fact that you're away from it all. This is a vacation, and there's no reason you shouldn't be able to enjoy it.

Let me know how it goes.

The Travel Queen
Hillary Easom
Travel Queen's website

Here's what Hillary shared with us recently: "Actually, I've worn my tiara in private for years. It's about time I came out of the closet as the Queen that I've always been!"

Hillary Easom is a recent Richmond transplant. She and her husband moved here from Chicago, where they resided for 6 months after a year abroad. Easom is a freelance writer and photographer specializing in health and—what else?—travel.

We'll post Hillary's articles in the Queens Travel Blog.

Here's the fun part. We also want to hear from you. Tell us all about a recent trip or use the blog to share news of an upcoming trip. Not only will it be fun to live vicariously through others:), but we can all learn something too. To share a recent trip with the queens simply send us an e-mail.

If you are planning a trip soon, please feel free to ask Hillary. Quite possibly, she's already been to your destination of choice. Check out the Queens Travel Blog for the latest tale.

Time for one more question . . .

Dear Queen of Travel:

I have a trip planned to the Grand Canyon and would love to have
information that might help me maximize my visit there. Things to do, be
prepared for, or maybe some of those things you simply don't want to miss. Also, sometimes I know there are things to see that only the locals know about. One more thing, since I'll be coming from the southeast, anything in between that is a "must see" like in Texas, Oklahoma, Louisiana?

Ready to Go,
Girls Traveling West

Dear Girls Traveling West:

While I've lived and traveled all over the US, the Grand Canyon is oddly
enough one of the places I have not been. I can, however, give you some suggestions gleaned from other travelers; just know that I take no responsibility if these tips are hogwash!

Apparently, the view from the South Rim is better. Specifically, the paths
from the El Tovar Lodge are rumored to have the very best canyon views. General consensus is that the South Rim attracts 95% of visitors and is therefore much more crowded, but it is also at a lower elevation (6800 feet)—hence the ability to see more of the Canyon. On the other hand, the North Rim is supposedly greener and cooler, which could be appealing if you're heading there in the summertime. Just know that this Rim is over 8000 feet in elevation and therefore could be strenuous for people with respiratory or heart problems. Regardless of which Rim you choose, you're still at the Grand Canyon, so I suppose it's a matter of taste. As one visitor noted, "Looking over the rim is great and worth doing, but you can't see that much." There are other ways to really see the Canyon, though, if you're up for adventure.

One way to really get down in there and fully experience it is to take a
raft trip. One traveler says, "As long as you're not in intensive care,
you're healthy enough! There are raft tours for quadriplegics." The trips, I guess, can be as strenuous as you choose to make them, depending on your level of adventure.

Another popular option is a helicopter tour. A half-hour flight from the
South Rim to the North and back again will provide fabulous views and give you a showing of the Canyon that is beyond compare. One company that offers supposedly reasonably priced flights is AirStar, www.airstar.com, (800) 962-3869. I'm sure you can find other carriers via a Google search.

Evidently, there are loads of advertised flights that leave from Las Vegas, and some actually land inside the Canyon. And then, of course, you can hike or take a mule down into the Canyon. The South Rim has faster access to the bottom, I hear, as it is 2000 feet lower.

If you hike inside the Canyon, expect temperatures at least 20 degrees
warmer than at the top—ie, bring lots of water and sunscreen.

How long do you plan to stay at the Grand Canyon? Most travelers recommend staying at least one night. Here are one visitors remarks: "Please stay at least one night, preferably two. Even if it is foggy, which I had, along with rain and snow, the canyon will come peeking out, with rays of sunshine illuminating portions of the canyon, changing from moment to moment. Go out on an overlook and sit there for a while and take this spectacle in, rather than running around like the 80 mph tourist." That traveler recommended the Red Feather Lodge in Tusayn, just outside the south entrance, saying it was pretty reasonable with a nice room.

Others recommend the lodges within the park, claiming that they are some of the best places to stay. Most appealing is the proximity to the trails. It's important to note that the North Rim drive, which is paved, is closed until at least mid-May, and sometimes weeks longer. This year there was a lot of rain and snow, so attractions like the narrows will probably be inaccessible or more risky than usual. With the elevation of the area (6000-9000 feet), winter lasts a lot longer than in the surrounding desert areas.

Whew! I wish I were going. It's definitely on my list, though my husband's already been, so there are other places he'd like to hit first. I will get there, though. Have a wonderful trip!

Take care,
The Travel Queen
Making travel plans and need more info? Click here

PR Diva Queen
Christine Hohlbaum
PRDiva.Bravehost.com

For all the scoop on promoting your project or book ... ask our very own PR Diva Queen.

Dear PR Diva Queen:

My agent can help to promote my book, but in her role as a publicist she charges. She says she has done budgets from $1,000 to $50,000 (obviously well out of my range), however, I am seeing if she can do anything for $500.

Does it pay to spend this out in the hope of attracting attention and selling books?

Best wishes,
A Queen Trying To Figure It Out!

Dear Trying:

Your question points to an all-important issue all authors face: to hire or not to hire a publicist. I will quote the words of my wise sister, who has been a PR professional for over twenty years.

"No one will care about your book as much as you do." $500 is not a lot in their eyes. Think about a publicist as you would a lawyer. To get professional help, you have to pay for it.

There are a lot of things you can do to keep your book promotion campaign red hot. Make friends with freelance writers and journalists who cover your beat. Even if you can't help them with their story, put them in touch with people who can. They will treat you as the go-to person and you'll be in the forefront of their minds the next time they write a piece about your beat (positive energy).

Subscribe to AbsoluteWrite.com's premium newsletter with freelance writing opportunities. Since you are a writer, you could contact editors with story ideas you would write, get paid for them, and build a relationship with even more media members.

Do radio. It is fairly easy access to a lot of listeners. Continue to network and offer yourself as an expert in your field. Do as many speaking engagements as you can.

To sustain your passion, network with like-minded authors. We are all in this together. You have made a fine start. Challenge yourself every day to contribute to your book marketing campaign. In the long run, it will pay off, and you'll be happy you remained committed to your cause.

Warmest regards,

Christine Hohlbaum
PR Diva Queen

Stay tuned for Christine's next book: SAHM: I Am. Due out in May 2005. For more information on Diary of a Mother, click on the Amazon link above.

Don't forget! We want to help. To ask a question, click here,

Queen Camellia
Donna Warner

Donna Warner lives in Mississippi with the best boyfriend in the world. She wears many hats: Queen Camellia of the Late Bloomers, Advice Aunt, Wordsmith, Bookwife, Girlfriend. Having recently given up worrying about her grown children, the state of the world, and what everyone else thought of her, she has established the editing and critiquing service Smith&Wife. She recently edited Grab the Queen Power. She is currently working on a book of essays on spirituality of everyday life, Being in America, and is determined to finish the three novels that have been haunting her for some time.

Dear Queen Camellia:
What if you've been writing for years and find out you've been doing it wrong? What would you suggest as a starting point for someone like that?

Your truly,
Writing Wrong

Dear Writing Wrong:

First of all, I would ask you what you meant by ‘wrong.’ You cannot write ‘wrong.’ You have something to say and you write. We don’t talk ‘wrong’ or walk ‘wrong.’ But people who want to be speakers often train for speaking, and for the audience they wish to address. If you walk for any reason than getting from one place to another, you also train for your particular kind of walking. In a race, there may be hundreds of participants, but only one first place. Does that mean all the rest of the racers are ‘wrong’?

Writing to share with other people is a craft. The first criteria is to write. The second is to read. Read the types of things that make you happy…that make you want to slap yourself and say, ‘if only I could write like that!’ Then go back and see what qualities the story had that made you feel that way. Try to write a story which (or is that, ‘that’?) strives for the qualities that make you excited in other people’s writing. No, I take that back. Write to tell the story you want to write. Your own qualities will develop. See? There’s no one answer to how to write.

Take classes. Get other people to read your stories and give you feed back other than, “I loved it,” or “It was very nice.” Have them tell you where they were puzzled and what they liked best. If you agree, change it. If you don’t agree, don’t change it.

If you start to doubt yourself…Stop! Doubt is an absolute waste of time. If you doubt yourself, pick up a pen and write something very badly. Write drivel. Write with poor grammar. Then see what you liked in the piece you just wrote, and write it again…strengthening the piece as much as you can….or writing badly again, if the tension is too great.

Write for joy. Write to show off. Write to show the world what you need to tell it. And keep writing.

Donna
a.k.a. Queen Camellia
BeingInAmerica

Go visit a newly created blog for our writing queens, Queens Write About Writing.

Queen Camellia is the Queen to ask. Click here.

Queen of Plan Be
Diane Armstrong
CultivateLife.com

Want to know more about feeding your natural desire to Live Happily Ever After? Why ask Diane?

"I...Diane Armstrong, Queen of Plan Be, a Fellow Traveler who also Wants More, am someone who could play a valuable supporting role in your journey toward Happily Ever After. "

Okay, now you see why! So, got a question on how you can live happily ever after, then, e-mail Diane.

Dear Queen of Plan Be:

What is the first step to take towards a lifetime of happiness? In my case, the courage to take that step towards a work experience I love.

Warmly,
Mary

Dearest Mary,

I would say the first step is giving yourself permission to be happier starting Right Now. A lifetime is a reflection of all the steps we have taken. The happiness part depends on our point of view and nothing - not the work experience, the relationship, nor the stuff - can ever become a lifetime of happiness if we are never happy in the present moment.

This is where courage comes into the picture. Courage is the strength to keep getting up off of our "buts" until everything we see can viewed from a happier perspective. What we focus on grows. This is one of Life's Truth.

Specifically you can build up your courage muscle by taking one step at a time based on how you feel Right Now. If you are feeling terrified about creating a work experience you love, choose a step that feels scary. This is your perfect step toward happiness. If you feel scared, choose a step that makes you feel nervous and this becomes another perfect step up the happiness scale. With each step, you are increasing your ability to enjoy each moment of your journey toward a work experience you love, which can't help but also ripple out into other areas of your life as well.

And there's More! Each step and its resulting experience creates luminous pearls of wisdom within your Heart Center. These wisdom pearls, polished by your experience and strung together like beads, is what will eventually form an exquisite set of jewels reflecting your lifetime of happiness. In my humble opinion, I don't know of a more important and priceless gift we can leave to future generations!

Best wishes as you continue stringing your pearls Mary. Once you have taken that first step, I'd love to brainstorm with you to help you decide your next one.

Love,

Diane Armstrong
Queen of Plan Be

Got a question for the Queen of Plan Be? Click here